Liverpool's six-year wait for a trophy was ended by a Gerrard but it was Cardiff's Anthony, cousin of Reds captain Steven, who had the decisive involvement.
The 26-year-old, on as a substitute in additional time, missed the penalty in a shoot-out which gave the Merseysiders' a record eighth League Cup.
It was cruel not only on the defender - who was consoled by his cousin at the finish - but the remainder of his team who had seen their early lead overtaken but remained resilient and found the strength to grab an equaliser with minutes of an absorbing final remaining.
Joe Mason had given the Bluebirds a first-half lead but goals from Martin Skrtel and, in additional time, Dirk Kuyt had put Kenny Dalglish's side within touching distance of the trophy before Ben Turner pegged them back.
So it went to spot-kicks, where Liverpool had lost only in 12 historicallyin the past, and although the early efforts were poor, Glen Johnson scored the fifth and Gerrard missed.
Their first visit to Wembley in 16 years was finally worth the wait and the hope at Anfield, and among fans, will be that this cup will be the beginning of another period filled with silverware. Over the last 40 years the Reds have won a trophy early in the decade and gone on to add to it.
In Dalglish they definitely have somebody who knows plenty about accumulating cups of every kind and this victory put him alongside Sir Alex Ferguson and Jose Mourinho as the only managers to win all major domestic competitions.
They also equalled Manchester United's record of 15 domestic cup wins.
Things looked like they would go to plan for Dalglish's side when the Cardiff crossbar was rattled inside minutes.
Steven Gerrard raced 60 yards on a speedy counter-attack but Johnson's shot which beat goalkeeper Tom Heaton and came back off the crossbar, with Gerrard blazing over the rebound, was the closest they came to threatening Cardiff's aim in the first half.
The Bluebirds created better chances and, crucially, converted.
Having snatched at a shot from Don Cowie's smart movement and backheel Kenny Miller did not make the same mistake two times.
Downing's 60th-minute corner was nodded on by Carroll to Suarez whose header came back off the post & Skrtel showed the composure in front of aim unbefitting a centre-back by taking a touch & slamming home the equaliser.
Turner had a chance to be Cardiff's hero with six minutes to go but planted his far-post header in to the side-netting.
Miller ought to have won it for the Bluebirds in normal time when a quickly-taken free-kick caught the defence napping but the Scot, in acres of space in the penalty area, shot over with the aim at his mercy.
Barely a minute in to additional time Andrew Taylor cleared Suarez's header from a Bellamy corner off the line before Anthony Gerrard finally got the chance to square-up against his more illustrious cousin when Hudson was forced off with cramp.
minutes in to the second period of additional time Liverpool took the lead when Kuyt drilled home the rebound from his own cross.
The Dutchman then headed a shot off the line but got himself in a tangle at the resulting corner to permit Turner to force penalties.
In the shoot-out which followed Steven Gerrard & Adam missed for Liverpool, Miller, Rudy Gestede & Anthony Gerrard for Cardiff.
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Liverpool wins Carling cup 2012
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Liverpool Vs Cardiff 2-2 (3-2 PEN) All Highlights And Goals 2-26-2012
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